kirkngo

People usually don't believe in things such as karma... but me... I do and I believe that karma has its own way of affecting people...

just recently a friend or should I say an ex-friend of mine left me behind and treated me with the exact opposite of what good I have done to his life... he treated me like I am no one ad now, he is the no one.... actually, I have a personal motto of my own especially to people whom has done very evil things to me despite the good things I have done to them... it goes like this, “if ever you do something to me that is not good, don't expect me to retaliate back because I wouldn’t. Instead, I would expect karma to come to you and I would promise you that by the time it comes to you, you would wish that you have never done the bad deed to me..." simple, isn't it? also, I believe that karma comes to you at the time that you don't expect it to come... and also, I picture my own wish of how karma comes back to those people and it usually happens... what I wish that would happen to the person would usually happen to the person... and it is not my fault... what usually goes on my mind is this, “it is better for me not to retaliate and let God do the retaliation for me... for I believe that everything in this world is balanced... if something bad happens to me, in this case the betrayal of a friend, something good will come my way in the future.... and if something good happens to the betrayer, in his/her case, his plan went off perfectly, then comes bad karma to him/her...."
just recently, I visited my own school, then I saw this foolish betrayer of mine without friends.... poor person... has no one to talk to and even go to in times off problems... in my case? my best friend just came and we had the best of times... the laughter and the silly joke and the thrilling stories all combine to make me feel great all the time... but in the poor person's case, I just found out that his life was miserable... but the karma I pictured for him isn't what is happening to him right now... I expect more... every time I see him, I want him to suffer even more than what I suffered from what this person has done to me... but that's just pure evil to think of that... if this person thinks that it is already karma... then I think it is enough for the person to ask for forgiveness to the person whom he/she did evil things to....
I’m just a simple person... I’m not God... as long as I know that you have experienced what you should be experiencing in exchange of what you have done, why not forgive? But after forgiveness, I expect a long talk because I do have a lot of questions... I’m naturally forgiving but in times that you went too far, I don't care even if you die in front of me... I am a person that can be very light and forgiving and I am a person that can also be as tough and as unforgiving as an evil person... that's who I am and I won't changed because I know that I am naturally a good person, it is just the people who come to me that makes or brings out the evil part of me... in common cases, I am just a simple, calm, and patient person...

here i am, at my school.. i don't want to mention the name because it is for my protection...

(sigh).... my question is, am i that good? really, the people in my block always counts on me.. or should i say, expects me to have a good grade and always expects me to do good in every damn project.. yeah sure i can do a simple project? but i don't think that i am that good... i mean, what the hell are they thinking??!
they are so amazed of my ideas that i think is very very lame... for them it is a good idea but for me, i don't think so...
i mean, for every single project they would tell me that i am so good.... not to brag about it but i don't think that i am that good as the people here would think...

here is the funny thing here at my school, recently, some losers of our class are calling names on me, well, i think that they are just insecure of me... jealous of the fact that they are the type of people who entered this school because they have nothing else to go to..(oopss here goes a clue)... well, to be frank, they boil me up but i don't show it to them... i still stay relaxed because i know that a smart and decent guy never gets into quarrels.... that is what i think.... well well.... some people really are envious because they themselves know that they cannot reach for higher grounds because they think that they are not capable... but the truth is... they don't try to each for their goals, they just stand watch other people go for higher grounds and if ever they had the opportunity to pull them down, they do it... curse those people who do that... why don't they just get a life?? i mean, we are born here for a purpose... not to just stand or stay in their seats and get jeallous of people who are higher than they are and find means to pull them down.. these people shouldn't be respected.. because they themselves have no respect on themselves....

"After a While"
After a while you learn the
subtle difference between
holding a hand and
chaining a soul.

And you learn that love
doesn't mean security,

And you begin to learn that
kisses aren't contracts and
presents aren't promises,

And you begin to accept
your defeats with your head
up high and your eyes open,
with the grace of an adult,
not the grief of a child,

And you learn to build your
roads on today because
tomorrow's ground is too
uncertain for plans

After a while, you learn that
even sunshine burns if you
get too much.

So plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul,
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you
really can endure...
that you really are strong,
and you really do have worth.

And you learn and you learn...
with every good-bye..
you learn...

- Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul (vol. 1)